Grace stops with me, but it doesn't have to. A call to change the focus of our thoughts.

I haven't written in a while simply because I haven't made the time. I have a problem with boundaries. I have a problem with saying yes. I have a problem with perfection. I have a problem with seeing the big picture and expecting it immediately. So maybe that last sentence was too wordy. It should have said, I have a problem with patience. 

Yet with all the wrong I am able to admit, I still find it difficult to show myself grace. Grace stops wth me. I seem to require more of myself than I do of others. I linger in the planning stages of things because I fear executing the plan and getting it wrong, but it's not really failure that I fear. It's rejection. It's feeling inadequate. It's being devalued. 

I work really hard to notice value in others and strive to find the strengths rather than highlighting weaknesses. (Well except for my husband. Don't ask my husband, then this entire thought will be blown.) Yet, when I make a mistake I get that pit in my stomach like everybody is staring and pointing. Now, I realize that isn't actually happening because people have much better things to do with their time, but somehow it feels so real.  The mistake begins to chip away at my value. It's like getting moved to the clearance rack with a "reduced" sticker brightly displayed over my former worth. 

Now although I battle this in my own brain, I'm not a fan of this thinking. I know the truth is that my value is not wrapped up in my performance. I also know that perfection isn't an achievable goal, but excellence is. I also understand that there is positive potential in every situation. Even with this knowledge it never seems to rise to the surface when needed most.

Maybe you are thinking, me too! So how then do we overcome the mindset that we know is incorrect? We change our thinking, or more accurately stated, we change where we focus our thinking. We don't allow the thought to be the reality, but rather allow the reality (the truth of value and potential) to be the thought because what we think, we become. We take control of our minds. We purposefully and intentionally redirect our thoughts to truth. 

It's most definitely a process that will take work and time and may even be painful at moments, especially those moments when self pity, anger, and bitterness feel so comfortable. Still, to succeed we must do the work, create the mental routine, and endure the struggle. If we'll do that, I've heard that it will transform our minds. 

This is from the me that is in the process of changing the focus of my thinking. Maybe if the you reading this is at a similar state you can join me on the journey. Let's focus our thoughts on true value and worth, strive for excellence in all things, and allow the grace we have for others to flow into our own lives. 

Every child has potential. Help us remove the soundtrack of defeat from the next generation.

Here's a revelation for you: 

One stands flawed and broken. Played both victim and offender and found neither offers much esteem to one’s self worth. 

Full of big dreams yet tamed by a mindset that speaks of one’s lack of potential. Living marked as an object that has been discounted. Doing tasks that merely resemble living yet never fully experiencing the freedom and excitement of thriving. 

Maybe this story is familiar to you. Maybe not, but there is one thing that I know. I don't want the next generation to live with the soundtrack of defeat which is why I am so passionate about The Cool Table. A place that believes that every kid has potential and can know victory and purpose. 

If this story was familiar for you, please hear this: You have potential. You have value. You were created for a purpose. 

If you believe that every kid has potential then join us. 

I've realized that we're different, but I won't be defined by it.

It's tragic, yet it's obvious. Hatred and difference are the discussions of the day. Pain and injustice are prevalent. Opinions and passions are heightened. I want to speak up. I want to make a change, yet my voice feels so insignificant in the noise of it all.

I believe in fairness, justice, and equally; yet the reality is that we are different. I'm not speaking of the difference of skin color or those things that can be held with the human eye. We are so much more than our outward appearance. We are different in ways that when put into proper view make us extremely dependent upon one another. We are different in the strengths we possess and the weaknesses we carry. We are different in what motivates us and what hinders us. We are different in how we learn and how we communicate. We are different in our dreams and our desires. We are different in our stories and our defining experiences. We need different because without it we would posses the same strengths and unravel in the same weakness. We would be like a cluster of puzzle pieces cut into the same shape who are unable to connect to one another and make something more than themselves. Without different we would never experience the beauty of unlike pieces fitting together to make something amazing. 

But in our differences there is one thing we all have that is the same. This common thread is called choice. No matter how different we are, we all have a choice.

We can choose to be defined by our differences, the limitations, mindsets, and injustices that seem to separate us, or we can choose to be defined by love. A love that see how one's strength can unite and cover another's weakness. A love that can see how one's power can lift another's injustice. A love that acts in such a way that those who are chained by the mindsets of hate can become free. 

Will you choose to defined by love?